Chapter 6: How do I use wearing a bra as a punishment?

Many women, quite understandably, feel rather uneasy about the idea of inflicting punishment upon a man they love dearly. The very words conjure up images of cruel leather-clad dominatrices whipping grovelling naked slaves to satisfy their insatiable lust for degrading men, with no regard for how this may affect the men in question. It cannot be stressed enough how far removed the loving practice of brassière discipline is from such stereotypical ideas of sadomasochism, even when having to wear a bra is used as a punishment. Its purpose is not to wantonly hurt or humiliate your husband without reason, but rather to help foster a kinder, more considerate side to the man you love, keeping him from succumbing to temptation or developing bad habits. Just as one must scold a child who has been playing with matches, or a dog that jumps aggressively at strangers, so too must one occasionally discipline an errant husband. Like the fire-lighting child or the antisocial dog, your husband is unlikely to enjoy such a punishment at the time, but can only benefit from it in the long run.

It would be easy for a man who is new to brassière discipline to regard having to wear any kind of bra for any length of time as a punishment simply because it is not something he would otherwise choose to do. Whilst it is possible to adopt such an approach, something that is easily done without thinking by a wife starting to bra train her husband, this is not without its pitfalls. Many women new to the idea of brassière discipline do not initially intend their husband to be brassièred for any length of time, but discover that the more he wears a bra, the more they prefer him to do so, thanks to the beneficial effect it has on his behaviour. A man who has been consistently taught that wearing a bra should be regarded as a punishment is likely to feel demoralised and rejected in such a situation, feeling that he is being constantly punished without doing anything to deserve it.

It is important, therefore, to draw a clear distinction between having him wear a bra on an everyday basis and having him wear a bra as a consequence of particular behaviour. The distinction should be stressed regularly such that your husband is never in any doubt as to why he is wearing a certain bra at any given time. This is of particular importance when transitioning from using brassière wear in a certain situation as an isolated punishment to making wearing a bra in the same situation a more regular occurrence. A man who has been told “I want you to wear a bra today to make up for coming home late from the pub last night. You wouldn't have behaved so thoughtlessly if you'd been wearing a bra, you know. Hurry up and put it on!” knows exactly what he has done to warrant such a punishment, and precisely what he should avoid doing if he does not want to suffer a similar fate in the future. If, at a later date, the same man is told “I'd like you to start wearing a bra more regularly, dear. You've done nothing wrong, but you're so much kinder and more thoughtful when you wearing one”, then he knows exactly where he stands without wondering what he may have done to deserve being brassièred. Such a man could then be told “You'll be wearing this padded bra today because of how rude you were yesterday”, and would understand that the padded bra was a punishment whilst his regular brassière was not.

Bearing all of the above in mind, therefore, there are three factors that may be used to distinguish a punishment brassière from one that is merely intended for regular wear:

For such discipline to be effective, it is vital that your husband submits to his bra punishment completely and unconditionally, understanding exactly what he has done to deserve such discipline. Needless to say, he must not be allowed to remove his punishment bra under any circumstances until he has served his time wearing it, however displeasurable he may find that to be. Securing his bra against tampering is thus essential if he is to wear it in your absence, but even around the house, it is extremely psychologically effective for him to be locked into his brassière for the duration of his punishment, particularly if he is expected to offer a full and contrite apology prior to being released.

We shall now look at various ways in which a brassière may be used specifically for punishment purposes, rather than for mere everyday wear. You may also find it useful to reread the chapter of this guide that discusses how to hide the tell-tale signs of a bra, with a view to making doing so more difficult for your husband, as well as the chapter concerning enhancing the male bra wearer's breasts, something that is ideally suited for use in disciplining an errant husband.

Make him wear a bra in particular situations

Depending on the extent to which your husband is already brassièred, you may choose to punish him by making him wear a bra at times when he would not normally do so. If your husband has a tendency to misbehave in particular situations, for instance, it is those situations that are best suited for his brassière discipline. The tightness around his chest, coupled with the fear of discovery, will help to remind him of his previous misdemeanours and keep him from repeating his mistakes, knowing that to do so would warrant further brassière punishment. Another approach is to make him wear a bra in situations he is already likely to find particularly stressful, where the presence of his brassière will be even more troublesome than usual. Doing so combines the two in a way that your husband will find much more unpleasant than either by itself, resulting in a punishment he will do his utmost to avoid in future. You may, for instance, wish to consider:

Even if your husband is already brassièred for most of the day, there is no reason you cannot have him wear a different bra for those situations in which you wish to emphasize his discipline. A brassière that is uncomfortable to wear or difficult to hide will have a similar effect on a man who used to wearing bras as a regular brassière would on a man who has never worn one before.

Make him wear a bra that is too tight

Figure 6.1: This basque is two sizes too small, and thus exceedingly uncomfortable to wear. Multiple padlocks ensure my husband is not tempted to loosen it.

The simplest and most effective way to make your husband's bra wearing more uncomfortable is to have him wear a brassière that is too tight, which in the context of male bra wear means one that has a smaller band size than normal, the cup size being irrelevant for most men. Wearing such a bra will soon become very irritating, causing the man unfortunate enough to be trapped inside to want to endlessly fiddle with it in a vain attempt at obtaining relief. Worn in a public setting, the man in question is in quite a predicament, knowing that any attempt at adjusting his brassière must be done in private so as to avoid the risk of discovery, yet at the same time longing to relieve his discomfort.

Most bras have several sets of eyes with which to fasten them, and if your husband normally wears his on the loosest of these, you may choose simply to insist on a tighter choice to make his brassière less comfortable. Generally, however, it is better to use a smaller sized bra for punishment purposes - not only does this remove any temptation your husband may have to loosen his torment, but it also serves to make a clear distinction between his punishment brassière and those he wears more regularly. A two inch reduction in band size is usually quite sufficient for this purpose, although a four inch reduction may be more appropriate for a harsher punishment. Some care should be taken to avoid excessively tight brassières, which can cause medical conditions such as trapped nerves if worn for too long - it is important that your husband should be allowed to raise any legitimate concerns he may have regarding this, provided they are more than just an unwillingness to accept his punishment.

Longline bras are ideally suited for use in this way, as are basques, particularly those with additional boning to help mould the figure. The extra length of such foundation garments serves to constrict much more of the upper body, with an effect that is not dissimilar to wearing a modestly laced corset. If your husband already has slight breasts of his own, you may find that a suitably chosen basque or longline brassière enhances them further, with its tight embrace causing his body fat to be pushed up and out into its cups, again in a not dissimilar manner to a corset. Figure 6.1 shows a basque being used for this purpose.

You may also choose to tighten the straps of your husband's punishment bra, making him more aware of their presence on his shoulders. This will pull the body of the bra up towards his armpits, and may also give a slight lift to any natural breasts he may have. You may find it necessary to sew the straps in place to prevent them lengthening again, either gradually through wear or as a result of a more deliberate adjustment on his part.

Make his bra straps difficult to manage

Figure 6.2: a) a bra extender; b) a 34” brassière; c) the same brassière, but with the band extended to 38”. Note how the position of the straps changes awkwardly.

As discussed in an earlier chapter, men have much more of a problem than women when it comes to keeping bra straps on their shoulders - not only does the bra wearing man find his straps slip more often than the woman for whom the brassière was intended, but he has far fewer opportunities to safely reposition them when they do. Consider, therefore, a brassière whose straps are disinclined to stay on the shoulders for any length of time, insisting on slipping down the arms at the slightest provocation. A man made to wear a bra with such errant straps will have a terrible time keeping it hidden, particularly if he must do so under a short sleeved shirt or T-shirt.

Such a torment may be constructed by taking a brassière that has a much tighter band than your husband would ordinarily wear, then restoring the band to a more appropriate length by means of bra extenders. These are short lengths of band with additional hooks and eyes which are readily available from many lingerie outlets and haberdasheries - one is shown in Figure 6.2a. Although such a bra is no tighter than usual, the bra extenders have the peculiar side-effect of moving the straps away from the centre of the body, making it much easier for them to fall from the shoulders without warning, as Figures 6.2b and 6.2c clearly demonstrate. Such a brassière poses quite a predicament for any man in a public situation where he cannot easily adjust his bra straps.

Alternatively, a bra with detachable straps may have the straps relocated by means of additional loops of ribbon sewn into the band of bra, allowing the degree of infuriation caused by them to be fine-tuned to your satisfaction. Making the straps slightly looser than they would otherwise be also increases their propensity to slip, although again you may find it necessary to sew them in place to prevent undesirable meddling.

Make his bra cups fuller

Figure 6.3: a) my flat chested husband wearing a T-shirt; b) the subtle bumps of an A cup bra underneath; c) a heavily padded E cup bra is impossible to ignore.

An entire chapter of this guide is devoted to ways in which your husband's breasts may be enhanced, and consequently, we shall not be going into too much detail here. Suffice to say, making his brassière fulfil its intended purpose, that is to say, supporting the breasts, is something that most men forced to wear a bra find intensely humiliating and uncomfortable, and is thus extremely effective as a form of brassière punishment.

Not only does padding out your husband's bra make it less comfortable for him to wear, it also makes it more noticeable, both to your husband and to those around him. Figure 6.3 illustrates a couple of the possibilities. A heavily padded brassière gives him an understanding of what it is like to have to wear a bra for support, as well as making it difficult for him to leave the house without risking the shame of being seen wearing such embarrassing attire. Such a brassière is ideal if your husband has chores that must be done around the house, as he won't be going anywhere else wearing it!

Conversely, a lightly padded bra may still be worn in public, despite any protestations your husband may make to the contrary. Provided the amount of padding used is not excessive, it is unlikely that anyone will give it more than an occasional second glance, let alone recognise it for what it actually is. Nevertheless, the psychological effect can be quite disproportionate, leading to a heightened state of anxiety in your husband, who may well be convinced that everyone is staring at his breasts. It should go without saying that this makes for a superb punishment technique.

Make him wear a bra under a thin white top

Figure 6.4: How embarrassing! There's simply no denying that my brassièred husband is wearing a painfully visible black bra under this thin white shirt.

We have previous discussed the right kind of clothing to wear if one wishes to keep a brassière hidden, namely several layers of thick, loose material, ideally featuring prominent patterns or textures. If your husband's behaviour requires correction, however, there is no reason not to look at the other end of the clothing spectrum. Of all the clothes likely to be found in a man's wardrobe, perhaps the worst for the brassièred husband is a thin white shirt, of the kind that might be worn for business meetings. Needless to say, your husband is unlikely to want to attend any meetings if he is brassièred under such a shirt, as it does absolutely nothing to hide his humiliating underwear, which is painfully visible through the thin material, as Figure 6.4 shows.

A similar effect may be achieved with a plain white T-shirt, particularly one that is tight enough to mould itself to the shape of your husband's body. For a more intense punishment, a fitted ladies blouse is exceptionally well suited to highlighting your husband's brassière, with its lines catching the eye and drawing them to the outline of his bra underneath. Regardless of which you choose, however, provided the material of the garment in question is sufficiently thin, even the colour of your husband's bra will be readily apparent to all around him. An everyday white brassière is quite sufficient in this respect, but a black one is doubly effective! Few women, let alone any men, would choose to wear such a combination unless they intended to draw everyone's attention to it as a means of making a fashion statement.

There are several ways in which this may be used as a punishment. Merely the threat of having to wear such an obvious brassière should be sufficient to bring an errant husband back in line. An interesting technique is to have him wear a thick sweater or a coat on top of such an outfit when going out. It should be readily apparent that his embarrassing secret will remain safe from discovery only as long as he keeps the coat or sweater on, allowing you to threaten to remove it if he misbehaves. The ever-present concern than you may actually do so, leaving his black brassière plainly visible, and the public humiliation that would immediately follow, should be more than enough to keep him in his place. If the weather is warm, you can tease him by asking “Aren't you hot in that coat, dear?” or “Wouldn't you be more comfortable if you took your sweater off, darling?”, to which he will most likely bluster and stammer, particularly in front of people who have no idea why he is so reluctant to comply.

Alternatively, a black bra under a thin white shirt is ideal for him to wear around the house, particularly if your husband is denied access to any other clothes with which to hide his predicament. Making him answer the door whilst wearing such an outfit is a particularly embarrassing humiliation for a man to have to endure, but there is no reason why he shouldn't - after all, he is fully dressed! Whether it be a cosmetics saleswoman or friends of yours who are aware of his brassière discipline, his face is sure to burn with shame at having to invite them in, let alone if the caller turns out to be another man!

Make him wear a bra as outerwear

Figure 6.5: The contrast between my brassièred husband's black T-shirt and white brassière highlights the detail of its lace beautifully. Locked in place, such a combination is a perfect choice for wearing around the house as a punishment.

Another delightful way of emphasizing your husband's brassière is to make him wear it on top of his normal clothing. This is best achieved using contrasting colours, for example, making him wear a white bra over a black T-shirt, causing any lace or other details to be highlighted against the darker background, as is demonstrated in Figure 6.5. To enhance the effect further, have him wear a second, plain padded brassière underneath - one with moulded cups is ideal. This will serve to give him the appearance of having breasts by invisibly filling the cups of the outer bra.

Make him wear only a bra

Figure 6.6: Whether it's doing the ironing or cleaning the toilet, making him wear nothing but lacy lingerie is a most effective way of teaching him his place.

In the privacy of your own home, you are free to have your husband wear whatever takes your fancy, without any of the concerns you might have if he were to be going out in public so dressed. With no-one to be offended by your husband's attire, there's nothing that says he has to wear anything to cover his brassière - indeed, keeping it openly displayed is an excellent way to remind him of its presence, particularly if it is weighed down with realistic breast forms. To keep him from forgetting what he is wearing, you can snap his exposed bra straps from time to time and tease him about how pretty he looks in such feminine underwear. If it is too cold for him to wear just a bra, you may allow him to wear a low cut strappy top as well, which will do little to hide what's underneath and still allow you the amusement of snapping his straps.

In warmer weather, you may choose to emphasize your husband's bra discipline by not allowing him to wear any other clothes for the duration of his punishment, keeping him completely naked apart from his brassière, perhaps adding matching lingerie if you prefer. Spending time around the house wearing nothing but a lacy bra and knickers, not to mention stockings and suspenders, is especially embarrassing and humiliating for a man, particularly if he is expected to perform household chores while so dressed - Figure 6.6 illustrates just two of the ways a brassièred husband may be put to good use. It is not uncommon for a man to become involuntarily aroused in such a situation, something that, to his shame, will be impossible for him to hide, but highly entertaining for those around him. By stressing his vulnerability in this way, you reinforce your husband's submissive position in your relationship, and provided his regular wardrobe is kept under lock and key, you can be sure that he won't be going anywhere else in a hurry.

How do I make the punishment fit the crime?

Whilst any kind of brassière punishment is likely to have the desired effect of discouraging further misbehaviour, there are occasions where a specific kind of punishment bra is especially well suited to dealing with the situation at hand. By making the punishment fit the crime in such cases, an errant husband is given a particularly strong deterrent against any subsequent disobedience on his part. Consider, for instance, the following:

Regardless of how you choose to discipline your husband, he will be relieved when his punishment is over, and may even be glad to return to his regular brassières. Either prior to, or immediately after releasing him from his punishment bra, it is worth taking the time to thank him for serving his time in it graciously, assuming that he has, and to express your desire not to have to resort to such punishment again. By focusing on the positive aspects of his bra discipline, you help him to regard it as being beneficial in the long run, however much he may hate it at the time, giving him aspirations of becoming the perfect, caring husband his wife needs him to be, whilst still leaving him with the unspoken understanding that if he misbehaves again, he should expect a similar punishment as a result. To this end, it is vital that any punishment should be reserved for genuine disobedience, and not meted out randomly without justification. It cannot be stressed sufficiently that brassière discipline should take place in the context of a loving relationship, solely out of love for your husband and a desire to make him a better person.